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ไอแอมฮาวิงเอเบรคเดาว์น

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May 29th, 2019 1 day remaining before starting a new journey Thailand, Isan, Udornthani Ward  thesammontague@gmail.com Oh buddy. I am currently oscillating between the verge of an emotional mess and the emotionless apathy of everyday life. As of the typing of this email, I have only broken down once and it was very brief. We will see as I get closer to Texas and further from friends and my Thai family. Some people say the time passes fast, while I have heard others say the opposite. I think it all depends on the attitude of which you experience your mission. I wouldn't say it passed by fast for me, rather in the steady passage of time (probably moving at 1.5x speed so it was faster but not enough to really notice). But wow did the end creep up on me. It is really hard to imagine not being in Thailand. The anxiety is still crawling just below the surface, so I know it is there but it hasn't fully hit me yet. My mission has meant so much to me. I wan
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Time makes me uncomfortable

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May 20th, 2019 11 days remaining Thailand, Isan, Udornthani Ward  samuel.montague@myldsmail.net This week has been spectacular! I don't know why or for what reason, but the Lord has decided to bless us with a few miraculous days. We have been given more than plenty of food in times of need, people have stopped  us  and asked us about religion and English class (which is growing so fast!).  Some of the people we teach that we have been working with have opened up their hearts and are committed to change and life is just amazing! It still hasn't gone through my soul that I will be leaving Thailand next week. It causes anxiety in the moments I think about it, but I have found myself so much- discovered who I am and what makes me happy- that it is hard to think of myself not being here. Maybe I said this all last week, but it is also scary to leave a role I am now comfortable in. This upcoming week is going to be uber crazy. It is my last full week, so I am going to
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Time is slipping by.... *LAST WEEKS*

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May 20th, 2019 11 days remaining Thailand, Isan, Udornthani Ward  samuel.montague@myldsmail.net **I don't know how or why I did not send this last week. Accept my apologies. I just found this chilling in my drafts. I tried to send it, but the wifi was skettcchhh** This has been such an interesting week. It feels like I don't have a grasp on anything! We have been working very hard on inviting and trying to find and help back those who have become less active and trying to help with callings. And it has seemed completely futile- very little has come from it. But the Lord has our back, because we have been  blessed  with part member families. We were hit with these open-hearted miracles on just the last day or two of the week tho... the Lord has continued to help me build my patience.  Sunday's are normally more stressful than other days, but that is particularly true here. It is too much. But it's still the Lord's day and I still try to find my pea
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